copyright 2001 NicholsonYou’re an agent showing a buyer a home and get all the answers that indicate the prospect is really interested in the property. But no offer is made. What happened? Maybe the buyer was a liar. Here are some clues to help you tell:
1. Liars avoids making eye contact and will look to the left when asked a question
2. Hands touch the face, throat or mouth or scratch the nose or behind the ear when lying
3. The timing will be off between the words and the facial expression. e.g. Saying “I love it” then a delay before the smile. In a natural response they will occur at the same time
4. Look for a forced smile where only the muscles around the mouth are used. A natural smile can be seen in the eyes squishing and displaying “crows feet’ from the corners. See how many fake smiles you can pick here.
5. A liar will not face you but turn their head or body away
6. A liar will tend to place objects between themselves and you
7. It is more likely a lie if no contraction is used–for example, saying “I did not do it” vs. “I didn’t do it”
8. A liar will speak more than natural and add more details… (I think thee protest too much?)
9. A liar will try to change the subject. A test is to change the subject yourself. The liar will eagerly follow along. A person telling the truth will be thrown off and want to stay on topic
10. Liars use humor to avoid talking about a subject they wish to avoid.
Source: bifaloo.com
This is moderately useful for the non-professional liar. The liars who are really good at lying, they know how to believe what they are saying and you cannot catch them on any of these things. The better the liar, the fewer the giveaways. But this is reasonably good advice for the average husband or wife or whatever, all of the ones, you know, who don’t have to worry about it. Most people will probably exhibit at least three of these symptoms when lying. But the people who really have to worry about it will be the people dating or married to the people who are really good at lying, who exhibit none of these symptoms. We’ve all met them. Even you, right?
The “look to the left” thing I’ve never understood. Is that proven? Could not a practiced liar practice looking to the right? Would he or she be unable to? I highly doubt it. I think it depends on the ability to believe, which can be a moment by moment thing. You ever watch a T V show where the actors where always looking to the left?
Would this work with real estate agents too? Probably not I would think. Salespeople are so used to lying that they probably don’t show any outward clues at all. Actually it would surprise me if they could actually distinguish between a lie and the truth.
I think in the end your clues are useful for people who don’t lie for a living or are basically honest people. Good for a real estate agent trying to figure out interest. Not so good for a customer trying to figure out if the agent is lying.
I’ve always noticed this one, first-hand, too:
A liar is more likely to question the *evidence* of an action having been performed (or not).
e.g. “What makes you think I did that” rather than “I didn’t do that”.
It is my understanding that the left-looking only works if you are right-handed. If you are left-handed, you will look to the right when lying. If you are ambidextrous, your eyes will cross! Lol. No, seriously, have a look at Neuro-linguistic programming for more about the eye thing.
There are many poker faced persons with relatively immobile facial muscles and whose body language is very sparse. This won’t work with them. Conversely, there are also those who employ an abundunce of body gestures even during common talk with exaggerated expressons, with whom also these tips won’t work. Moral: rely on your gut feeling. An experienced person will have enough of it developed.
Many people exhibit some of this behaviour when they are unconfident yet telling the truth.
Noir is correct on the right handedness. Thanks for pointing that out.
One way I spot a liar - granted this only works with my ex-wife…she moves her mouth
Maybe you should change the title of your article to:
10 Ways To Spot A Liar, or Mistakes to avoid in order to be a better liar
no wonder people don’t belive or trust me. because of retarded guidelines like these. I never lie yet ALWAYS do these thing in regular conversation. I have a problem with eye contact and get nervous when talking to people just because I am not a very talkative person. thanks for making life harder on me.
Sexy Geek: We might consider your Title if we were trying to promote liars but we are not
Bob: Thanks for sharing! We understand your point of view and it’s very valid. Seems like a great follow up post - 10 Ways to Overcome Your Nerves
To see 10 ways to become a better liar, vist vlads blog @ http://www.lekecinskas.com/10-steps-to-becomming-a-better-liar/
Thanks Vlad!
Pure Myth
Cognitive studies have shown that these common assumptions fail to spot a wide spectrum of pathological liars. The “won’t look you in the eye” myth is especially widely believed (especially by law enforcement), but is completely false.
These may help spot the nonpathological liar –like an employee or spouse.
One other sure sign: The person gives detailed explanations, even when none are asked.
Good point Harv.
These are only guidelines & by no means universal. And yes, consistent or pathological liars will not display these tells. Interestingly, teens may also be hard to read. I was able to lie to my parents throughout high school.
Geek & Jeff–very funny
Although this information is interesting, and perhaps even useful, I find post like this irresponsible since they don’t include a disclaimer. While these criteria may work on many people, no where does it mention to important facts. If this is your test for honesty your test will yield a bunch of false negatives (where a liar is deemed honest because he doesn’t exhibit the classic signs), and the far worse, the false positive which would be someone who is in fact telling the truth but for what ever reason exhibits the traits that this lists claims demonstrates that they are lying.
So even though the test may be accurate in most cases, the fact that it isn’t always accurate demands a statement warning people that this list is definitive proof that someone is lying, since alleging someone is lying without concrete evidence (which the things listed definitely are not) is just not nice, not to mention unethical and in some instances even illegal.
In case you need an example of some of the halve truths in the lists:
When a person attempts to change the topic it might mean that they are uncomfortable, but if you’re confronting them, depending on their personality, they may try to avoid the conversation regardless of guilt, or maybe you’re just annoying and you’re bring up things that they just don’t want to talk about.
The direction the person looks being an indication of whether they are telling the truth is controversial, and even among the psychologists who believe it to be valid, they say that it is only typical behavior, and one notable exception would be left handed people who would look in the opposite direction then right handed people. (and since nobody is typical in every respect, there is no guarantee that any given person will follow that pattern).
The statement about eye contact neglects the fact that many people are just scared to look at someone else’s eyes, especially if someone is in a position of authority, in fact in many Asian cultures it is considered rude for a subordinate to look at a person in authority directly, so in that case its not that there hiding, its that there being respectful.
Hasty generalizations is one of the main causes of discrimination, and lists like the above only help to propagate that type of thinking.
You bring up valid points jon and we thank you for taking the time to comment. You are especially right to note the cultural differences & similarities of nervous & shy people (as others have noted). But is not the statement that these behaviors are exhibited by shy & nervous people also a generalization based on similar study?
I think most people will understand that this is not an exact science. But the study of body language has shown some “correlations” in test subjects. Law enforcement has been particulray interested in these studies & used the findings. i would welcome anyone in law enforcement to add to the discussion since they are routinely faced with interrogations.
Whether we like it or not, studies have shown, albeit not conclusively, that there are some ‘tells’ exhibited by liars (ever watch poker on tv–why do the players wear dark glasses?). I think the problem is trying to use the tells to determine if in fact you have a liar on your hands or just a nervous perosn. No one is convicted on body language alone–the ultimate facts must bear it out.
One last point— consider yourself on the jury of a case. Do you not study the witness for indications in their body language & speech to discern whether they are being untruthful. Of course you do. Is it fair? i dont know.
maybe the person is suffering depression and wishes to avoid eye contact as they feel insecure? 1 in 3 will suffer from this at some point in their life.
avoiding eye contact seems to be a common ‘tell’ for many behaviors not all of which are untruthfulness. Thanks for pointing out this mental state experienced by many people.
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