10 Marketing Tips You Can Learn from a Prostitute


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1. Attract the attention of your target market. You must do what you can to stand out from the crowd. A short skirt and high heels work to attract a prostitute’s client. (It may also help a blog post get read)

2. Market in the places your audience can be found. Whether it’s street corners or specialty publications and websites, get in front of your prospects’ eyeballs. Pros don’t attract clients in church pews.

3. Upsell. After getting a ready and willing customer, expose them to options they might not have considered. Turn a downtown trip into an around-the-world adventure.

4. Have a clever or catchy brand name. Call girls marketing under Fantasy and Desire usually attract more calls than Fanny and Mabel.

5. Offer a product or service people want or need. ‘Nuff said.

6. Make the transaction easy. The less forms and red tape the better. A simple in and out procedure works best.

7. Promise quality and good customer service. The promise may get you a one-time sale but good customer service will have them coming again back.

8. If you want to charge more, offer something they can’t get anywhere else. Just like fruit, the rare and exotic always sell for more.

9. Have a call to action. Ask for the date. Be persistent.

10. Market happiness. Every client wants to walk away satisfied. Give them a happy ending.

Bonus Marketing Tip: Sex sells.

Caveat: There is, however, one thing you should avoid in marketing and sales: Screwing your customer.

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  • This is great marketing advice! Always have an edge, and always give them something to remember you by!
  • thecharismanglican
    What is with that blouse? Are you sure that's a prostitute? In Salt Lake City, maybe.

    The 'PTA girlfriend' experience.
  • Did I ever tell you how much I love this post? Too funny. You make a great connection there.
    BTW - I think your Tweet tool isn't working b/c I tweeted it and it still says zero. See you on Monday for HomeGain Live Nation!
  • Thank you, Jessica. I did have fun writing it.
    You might like this one too:
    http://blog.sellsiusrealestate.com/humor/top-10...
  • Yes, indeed. Better late than never, Sarah.
  • I'm kinda late, but I just came upon this post. Wonderful stuff! It gets goes to show that the marketing strategy can be applied to any industry!
  • Hi Brandie

    You can't leave this research to others.
  • Brandie
    Joe, just curious - was there research involved to prepare for this post? (smiles)
  • Think warm thoughts Eric :)
  • Short skirt and high heels this time of year in NH is pretty cold. Thanks for the laugh!
  • This one has to get my vote for the funniest RE.net post!
  • Just like the pro, we aim to please :)
  • I missed this one when it was posted. Too funny. You come up with the wildest stuff. I guess that is why I subscribe to your blog. Keep it up (no pun intended).
  • OMG, that was one of the best posts I've read. How Funny!
  • Amazing and up to the point comparison! But being persistent is not always easy and effective..
  • ONLY IN NY! TIMES SQUARE hasn't been the same since the "Other Rudy" cleaned up the mess. Great Post!
  • Hey Brian

    We now have a greater appreciation of marketing on the street.
  • Phil-

    I was just waving hello in that bathroom and four guys and three cops showed up. Is that an Idaho thing?
  • Ha Ha- You guys are DEFINITELY back and the rest did you well.

    I always thought Fantasy was a real name. Of course, I still believe that gentlemen's clubs are where a young man learns manners.
  • Hah - at first I thought this said marketers ARE prostitutes - as a marketer I am glad it's not that - good read.
  • Brandon, unless you give it away, anyone who renders services for a fee can be called a prostitute, and anyone who pays them a john.

    Todd-- I think pros are going after the rental market :)
  • Brandon
    Aren't most realtors prostitutes anyway?
  • What's that statistic about seventy-somthin' percent of all future buyers starting their search on the Internet?
  • lol..yes, they're never out of season. :)
  • Thanks ipanema.

    Real estate agents have been called realtwhores.

    Prostitutes seem to do a lively business whether things are down or up . Maybe we can learn a trick or two from them :)

    Have I tried any of the above? Is this a trick question :)
  • hahahahaha...what is this, the whoring of real estate marketing? :)

    it's funny though. i almost jumped at reading my feeds. this is normal topic with me...but you? well, you never seem to bore me with your topics.

    have you tried any of the above? :)

    Cheers!
  • pure sexy madness. i'm lovin it... ;)
  • 12. If you can't give it free, give a satisfaction guarantee.
  • Vintage sellsius post.
  • 11. Always use cash for questionable services.
  • ...well...the whole scenario could get shook out by discount brokers, and a little transparency here would go a long way, it seems.

    What would Pat Kitano do?

    This could almost make the Weenie take notice, ya know?
  • Now you just shake it Phil :)
    Marketing like the pros takes on a whole new meaning.
  • I commented in the wrong place before, so here goes again:
    So . . ., I went out and got me the heels and short skirt.
    Now, what is it I'm sposed to do next???
    One thing I know fer sure is that if you are from Idaho, you don't want to tap your foot in an airport bathroom stall :(
  • Seriously good link bait guys, nice job :)
  • Great Blog!!!!! I would have never connected the two but you made it sound so sleazy and sexy. I love it!
  • OMG!!!!

    I'm ROTFLMAO

    Great reading b4 bed

    cya
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