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Here are some tips to overcome your fear of public speaking, as well as those “ums” “ahs” and “like you knows”.

Tips to better public speaking

1. Speak on topics you know well. There is a comfort in knowing you know more than your audience. Come prepared with reliable facts. Part of a good speech is to inform.

2. Practice, practice, and more practice. Most of us are not naturals in front of a crowd. The more you speak, the easier it gets. Try a few dry runs at home with your significant other or family members– but not your mom (she will always say you’re just great). Be careful you don’t overdo it. An overly rehearsed speech does not play well and if you hit a blank spot, you’ll be dropping ums and ahs like greased watermelons.

3. Get to the room early, before people arrive. This will get you acclimated to the surroundings and help you relax.

4. Do not apologize or say it’s your first speech– the audience will be looking for your gaffs & you will feel it.

5. Keep it short, easy to understand and conversational. There are exceptions, of course, but generally avoid longiloquence and using words like longiloquence. People don’t usually attend conferences with dictionaries in hand. Talking down to your audience or parading in your mental underwear is generally to be avoided.

6. Smile a lot. Your audience will smile back and that will help put you at ease.

7. Know your audience and get them involved. Are you speaking to novices or similar experts in your field. If you don’t know, ask . Engage your audience with a question and ask for a show of hands. Take questions. Look at them, not your notes.

8. Use humor to lighten the mood, especially if you make a mistake. Use an interesting prop. Part of a good speech is to entertain. Humor is tricky, though. It has to be appropriate and not everyone is good use it. Some folks are too darn serious to be funny.

9. Start with an anecdote, quote or a story. It’s best if it’s your story and it’s interesting.

10. Show your confidence with body language–keep your head up, stand up straight (gee, I sound like Sister Mildred from 8th grade). Look people in the eye. Move around. It should be natural — not a like a tiger pacing in a cage.

11. Write an outline or just keyword bullet points– just like crib notes. If you write too much you will be tempted (and will) read from your notes.

12. When asked a difficult question– say “that’s a good question” — it will give you time to think of a good answer. If you don’t have a good answer, admit it.

13. If you have a handout, distribute it after you speak. If you do it beforehand, people will read and rustle the paper. Give a handout asking for feedback.

14. Be passionate. Show how much you love the topic you are speaking about. Unfortunately, this can’t be taught.

15. Be fearless. Some experts say acknowledge the fear. That may work, but I take a different approach — Do not be afraid of bombing. Believe you can overcome any obstacle and be effective. After my first few (worrisome) trials, I decided to embrace this mindset. It worked. Try it. (PS: It works for sky diving too)

Eliminating the ums, ahs, likes and you knows

The vocalized pause is the most common public speaking problem. Almost everyone does it. It stems from our discomfort with silence in a conversation. We are conditioned in our normal conversations to immediately respond after the other person speaks, without a pause. In conversation, the awkward pause is just that– awkward. So, when we publicly speak, we try to eliminate the pause with ahs, ums, likes, and you knows. But in public speaking, the pause conveys importance to your words.

1. Record yourself. This will help you identify the extent of your problem. Be prepared to be surprised.

2. Speak slower and be conscious of the silent pause. Embrace the pause.

3. When you finish a thought, take a breath.

4. Practice, practice and still more practice. There is no way around it.

5. Avoid caffeine before you speak.

6. Do a dry run and have a friend or relative Taser you every time you use a vocalized pause. Just kidding– have them raise their hand every time you do it.

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